Danny Phanfic: Danny and the big dance
by Mangadude667
Summary: This is my first fanfic ever! pls don't be too harsh, give honest feedback about what ya think ;). Thanks a ton, hope you enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Danny F continued combing his black-as-the-starless-sky-at-night hair. He glanced into the mirror for the thousandth time, beginning to feel the butterflies in his gut.

 _Just breathe_ , he thought to himself. _You see her every day at school, how hard could it be to dance with her?_

He sighed and laid the comb down, realizing that he would never feel adequate for the beautiful Jeanine. He gazed wistfully out his bathroom window, thinking over each and every one of her curvy nuances; her supple, creamy appendages. He was rudely awoken from this pleasant daydream by the abrasive bark of best pal Tuck.

"OI! Get down here Danny! We're going to be late!"

Danny grunted and began to head downstairs, adjusting his tie and slicking his hair back one final time, with meticulous care and gusto.

"Hey honey, good luck out there! Go kill 'em, old sport!" chimed in Mrs. Fenton.

"Moooooo-oooom!"

She ruffled his hair, completely ruining the fruits of the last few hours.

"Hey! Cut that out!" Danny whined plaintively.

Outside, in the street, from his Chevy, Tucker honked agitatedly, then sounded his car horn for a solid five seconds.

"I gotta blast, Mom," said Danny. "thanks for nothing" He added snidely under his breath, scrambling out the door to meet his ride.

" _Finally_ ," Tucker exclaimed, exasperated. "I was beginning to think Vlad had gotten to you, you old dog, you"

"Yeah, whatever, just drive man. I'm already late for Jeanine."

"Jeez, sorRY Mr. Prickles. Someone's anxious for their big date"

Danny glared silently out the window, trying to drown out the screechy whine with the honeyed thunder of Jeanine's sweet voice. Tucker glanced with a playful smirk.

"Hey. Come on. I'd kill for a date with the great Jeanine." Tucker nudged him with his elbow. "Boy, what I'd do to caress those magnificent-"

"Shut up man, I don't think of her like that. She's not like the other girls. She's much more unique. She's the most beautiful, pretty, attractive, intelligent, smart, honest, pure, caring, compassionate, chaste, financially responsible, hot, family oriented, softest-skinned, environmentally aware teenager in the whole tri state-"

Danny's daydream of his high school sweetheart was cut short by the sound of Tucker retching loudly for effect out the driver side window.

"Bleaaaaaah," retched Tucker.

" _You'r_ e a wretch," Danny snapped scathingly.

Tucker was going to need a whole lot of ice for _that_ burn!


	2. Danny at the Dance

Danny exhaled an utter sigh of relief as he extruded his corporeal being from the miserable confines of Tucker's vile Chevy Impala.

"I'll see ya off, chummy ol' bud!" cooed Tucker softly. "Be careful around Jeanine, they call her 'Queen of the pants-stealers' I hear". Tuck winked knowledgably. Danny contemplated all the vile ways he could reprimand his friend for his sheer distilled unadulterated impotence.

He shoved open the shabby, grease-stained excuse for a door of the Amity park community center. He was immediately stricken with the blasphemous odor of hundreds of euphoric bodies gyrating in unison. Danny scoffed ironically and begrudgingly launched himself into the pit of human dismay with one goal in his hormone-addled mined: acquire Jeanine. He was locked and loaded; and so was she. Their eyes lit up with enough coal to melt even the most voluminous glaciers of hope.

" _Hey_ ", she breathed, abashed. Danny shrugs, playing hard to get. "Pretty… smelly dress you got there" he mocked erogenously, knowing the well-traversed pathway to the fleshy innards of a red-blooded maiden.

" _Hoo hoo_ ", Jeanine bumbled humbly, taken aback by the erotic charms of her mannish suitor. Carving into this distilled moment of teenage bliss, Danny felt his nape tickled by the elongated phalanges that he knew could belong to only one man: Greg. "There's a bit of a _SPECTRAL SITUATION_ " Greg ejaculated urgently, full of spirit.

Danny glanced at Jeanine, the longing in her vivacious eyes, resplendent with the repugnant ire of 10,000 suns, implored him stay rooted and planted in the sickly mire of hallucinogenic adolescent glee.

Danny resisted the cosmically attractive magnetar and the gravitational pull of her celestial allure.

But he knew what he had to do, deep in the dank, grotto-like annals of his innermost grotesque being.

It was time to go ghost.


	3. Chapter 3: Dancing with Spirit

Danny trotted begrudgingly to what he knew to be, the visitor from the violin afterworld. He thrust open the door to the mess hall oozing with carcinogenic sludge. He lightly shoved the door at his posterior closed and daintily scampered through the room he shared, alone, with a ghost.

An apparition the exact size and shape of Samuel Clemens appeared before his peepers.

"Behold" said the ghost with aplomb. "It is I, a ghost". He zipped hastily. "Can't you tell I was URINATING? SPECTRALLY?".

"I know this is a mess hall, but not THAT messy!" Danny exposited from below. "Gimme the lowdown on your business, Mr. ghostlypants"

"Please, Mr. Ghostlyplants is my father. Call me Denquil. Denquil Wome Ghostypants.

"The only thing you're gonna be called is a cronely" comebacked Danny. He wished Sam could have been here to hear that, but she was off in Peru for her tchoukball scholarship.

Jeanine crashed upward through the floorboard like a majestic malodorous orca. "Daniel! What is that beast doing corrupting our youth?! Also, is that a ghost?"

Danny's former comments on Jeanine's intelligence were neutered. He faced… a quandary. Should he continue to solicit the lust of the wondrous Jeanine, or is she the idiot dumb?

"You've damaged my feelings!" gasped Ghastlypants. "I'm filing a complaint!" He rezipped, for it had come undone, and attempted a skedaddle from the tight pickle he had wound up inside of for the last several minutes… OF HIS LIFE!

"HUUUUUUUHHHHH?" gasped Jeanine and Danny at slightly different times as Gheeslypants dropped to the GROSS floor.

Dathaniel murdered the ever living fuck out of the ghost.

"Baby girl, I bet you've never had THAT kind of first date before" Danny mused slyly and clearly adeptly, wrinkling his nose at the languid miasma. "Speaking of my asthma, I can't inhale and exhale regularly! I sure wish Sam were here. She always stashed my inhaler within the confines of her GAP crop top T shirt. But she in Peru, for her brother's clarinet recital".

"You don't need to tell me twice!" nutted Jeanine exasperatedly "Let us return to our time of bliss, at the Big Dance!"

Danny swept his hair and then, his gal into his meatful boy arms, being careful to breathe only through his mouth. His ladyfriend swooned with glee and dizziness and perhaps, a small measure of nausea. They exeunted back onto the glistening dance floor to resume control of their mutually assured jig. Jeanine was Irish, by the by.

"I hope there are no more ghosts tonight!" Danny foreshadowed without repercussion.


End file.
